The History of Ellen

-haven’t felt like writing
-been doing lots of reading: Lincoln b David Herbert Donald; Hoot, The Girl with the Dragon Tatoo; Under the War Torn Sky; various blogs, the Wapo, and the People mag
-started fixing up the bathroom, but waiting until the showering two move out (tomorrow!) seriously 2 showers a day each?
-redesigned bedroom, but need cash
-plans for kitchen but see above
-plans to maybe go to river w/a friend !!
-plans to go to my parents’ place for a few
-two day class that starts tomorrow
-and a painting class!
-in a foul mood today
-Pioneer Woman was in person exactly as she is online: boots, smile, dimples, long red hair, sweet as honey….
-I’m intrigued by Abraham Lincoln, and also, I’ve been reading the letters of R.E. Lee since they were a free download for iPhone
-cleaned up the porch, but need a fan out there, and some lights, and a few plants
-I fail at tomato plants
-the rosemary is growing!
-I killed a hosta

I’m looking forward to next school year which is crazy considering the last one, but oh well.

Summer. today i don’t have to go in to school at all, I finished my room! So far, I am still in my jammies, and have watched trashy TV and surfed the web. I also am playing solitaire. How boring! But, I love it. I will do more stuff at some point, but I may do nothing today. In other news:

My tomato plant has no tomatoe and no flowers, nothing.
My dog is shedding a lot. Tons of hair everywhere. He is a collie, so go figure.
I made tamale pie last night, delicious. I had another piece just now.
I seem to bake at night while I am asleep and wake up very hot and sweaty. Yuck.
We have ants. Lots of them.
I am shocked at my students’ lack of brains on their facebooks…..I mean to have your profile pic be of yourself smoking what looks like a joint?
I spend way too much time thinking about Real Housewives….

I’m going to try to blog more and better.

So, everyone is talking about their plans, but I don’t have any. I mean, I have house stuff to do, and we *might* go camping, but that is it. I am wondering if I should get a job or something to do so I don’t get too bored.

A student asked me if I would cry on the last day of school. I wanted to reply “Hell NO!” But I said heck instead. I am so glad this year is ending. It has been one of the worst school years ever. Although 98.5% passed their SOL, so academically I did see some results. It is just the attitudes and the lack of visible administration and some of the other teachers. I know I am being sabotaged on the upcoming field trip, so I am going to outsmart them.

Rambling boring post. Sorry. Nobody reads this anyway! Ha!

Ok, doing this by way of: http://www.pinklemonadeblog.blogspot.com/
and…. http://www.mannland5.com/
The questions.. (I’m answering before reading anyone elses so as to be authentic)

1. Do you have a fetish?
If defining fetish in a sexual way, then no. If defining it as something I obsessively like, then maybe: food.

2. Do you sing in the shower? Not really, but in the car, I belt it out like nobody’s business. And, I ‘m good.

3. Who was your first crush? Jimmy Clark, first grade.

4. What do you think is the best manly trait a guy could have?
Physically: biceps. They might be a fetish.. Oops
Personality wise: being able to make me and others laugh.

5. Do you sleep naked? No, with all these rolls and folds and stuff, I need absorbancy. Too much info? As usual.

6. What do you do when (you think) no one is looking? Pick my hair, fart, make faces, roll my eyes, and flip the bird. (not really on the last one)

7. What’s the first thing you do when you go online?
Lately, facebook.

8. Summer is…..?
Delicious, lazy, the best part of my job, hot, sometimes boring, and way, way too short.

Ok, so I am a big fan. I know she probably doesn’t have the same political views, and I know she is filthy rich, but I still like her. Today, I bought her book, and on Tuesday I am going to get her to sign it. What should I ask her? What should I say? What should I wear? Will we become instant friends and someday I’ll be rolling up to the lodge to be a guest? Will she take one look at me, fake smile, sign the book, and then start eyeing the person behind me?

I am thinking way too much about this.

Oh, well, it is taking my mind off this school year, which btw, they are adding 10 minutes to each day. Seriously? Just add one more freaking day (so I can use it as a personal day) because 10 more minutes with the kids will kill me. Although, if they add it at the end, it won’t really effect me, unless they add it core 4, which is my 2nd most challenging class. As mom always says, time will tell.

I am really looking forward to this school year being over. I usually look forward to summer, duh, who doesn’t? But this year, I don’t have that feeling of melancholy that I usually get thinking of missing some of my favorite students.

This year, I guess it could be the grade level, or it could be the changes in the administration or it could be me, has been rough. I’ve never experienced the defiance from kids that I have this year. Kids usually don’t like being disciplined or corrected, but this year they have gone a step further and gotten angry and gone over the top when they are corrected. They run to whine to who ever in the building will hear them. And, the culture in the building has changed so that who ever hears their complaints actually encourages them to complain more and even make stuff up. I have had coworkers in the past who didn’t love me, and one a long time ago who tried to sabotage me, but this year the one coworker I am speaking of has been truly hateful.

It has seriously made me consider leaving. Walking away from the retirement and the friends I have in teaching, and doing something else. I don’t have that luxury, however, as debts and living expenses require my salary, and I don’t have any other marketable skills. I wish I could write well enough to have a marketable blog and make a living from that like pioneer woman or dooce….

Teaching is a wonderful thing, it can be fulfilling, enlightening, rewarding, exhausting and fun. It just isn’t any of those things right now. Except exhausting.

Well, this is a depressing post.

So, I have a warped and romanticized view of camping. I picture hot dogs on a stick and a glowing camp fire and a relaxing time soaking in fresh air and stars. I have been camping in a tent exactly once, and it was so long ago, and in a time in my life that I have amnesia (selective?) about. My other camping experiences are weird, to say the least.

Let me start by saying that my constant nagging at my husband that I want to go camping -be away from the internet, tv, and other electronic distratctions – led him to make our spring break vacay into a camping trip. We don’t vacation every year, in fact, it is probably considered rare in our lives. Money, time, and motivation or responsibilities have become obstacles. So this year, some very generous friends have offered up their time share in New Orleans for spring break, and I jumped on it. Scott, who is from NO, has not been back since before we were married, and I know he misses it, and since he brought me back to my beloved Carmel after a several year (decade?) absence, I felt it fitting.

Then he got all frugal and such, and decided to combine my desire for a camping trip – which is ill advised, and not in my nature even though I dream about it, come on, I have fake nails, and am sort of high maintenance!! It reminds me of…..

Fontana Village. Time: Somewhere in the 1970’s. Who: me, my two teen sisters (I was like 10 or so) my mom, and dad. So my mom finds this resort (?) in the Smoky Mountains somewhere and decides that based on the glossy brochures of happy families in the glistening aqua pool, green green mini golf course, and the lovely mountain hiking and horse back trails, not to mention the gorgeous lake created by Fontana Dam we should go and have a family vacation.

Up until then, we had quasi vacations: Seeing historical or nature site while in transit during a move required by the Navy; European tours which were held while I was still in diapers and have no memory.

So, the Buick was loaded and we left. Upon our arrival, several nauseous hours later ( I get car sick) we arrive to our “resort” Up on a hillside a duplex, screened cabin awaited. We spent little time there. It was awful.

Day One: Dad discovers that this place resides in a county that is a “dry” county. DT’s anyone?
Day Two: Mini Golf, in a temper tantrum, my attempt at a long drive involves hitting my fragile sister in the head with a golf club. It was an accident, but to this day at any holiday gathering it is mentioned, and I am not forgiven, and not believed about it being an accident. Sorry.
Day Three: Horse back riding in a group on a trail. Having been used to horses via our previous adventure owning a pony (a disastrous experience to be chronicled later) we were unenthusiastic. I got a rogue horse who had to be right behind the trail leader. Only one rearing up and bucking sent me into spasms. Nightmares about that day are still frequent.
Day Four: Dad takes us out in a motor boat on a lake. In which he reminds us of the drive in and how we saw the super tall dam and we were on the other side, and there were these big spinning pools of water in which we could get sucked in and all drown. And, then he would pretend we were getting sucked in there and ha ha ha ha isn’t that funny kids??
Day Five: My sisters either got a night to themselves or there was a “teen” event, I don’t know, but my parents took me to a movie:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0066181/

Day Six: A really long drive, straight through, in near silence, back home.

The end of our “family vacation” attempts. Lesson learned.

Except: 2010, I attempt to do it again. Camp (in cabins) on the way to and from New Orleans. My goal: to convince my husband to spend the extra money on airfare, rental cars, and hotels…..at least while he is married into this family.

For many years I ignored television. I read, watched tapes, listened to music and didn’t watch TV. Okay, it was because I couldn’t afford cable, but anyway…. The past few years I have been corrupted. I now secretly (well, not anymore) watch reality television. I love it. Real Housewives is one of my favorites. Add in the int ernet, wifi, and a laptop, and I am a monster. If you are clueless on this, ignore the rest of this post.
O:C
Gretchen: gorgeous, funny, a bit fake, and probably a savvy golddigger. Oh well. Use what you have.
Jeana: too real for TV most likely, but I like her. She is like Jill. Very real. I like her kids, y too.
Vicki: I was kind of grossed out by the vow renewal – but I think it was genuine, since she did it without a giant extravaganza..(except for the millions of viewers). She is a bit of a prima donna for me, and too much of a sales person.
New Girl: Jesus freak. She is boring to me.
Slade: I loathe him entirely.
Donn: probably too good for all of these people.
Simon: I kind of like him. He is a bit military/old-fashioned/closed minded for me. I think Tamra changed the game on him and it caused the break up.
Tamra: Skank; white trash; not very smart, and all of those beliefs I had before this season. The night she had Gretchen over, and plotted to encourage tequila shots, my mind was made up. She is not a family woman, as she claims to be. She said after Lynn’s party to Vicki that she didnt want to be around Gretchen because she (Tamra) had family morals blah blah blah…then wants to be friends with Gretchen, and then is offended when Simon calls her out as a hypocrite. Housewives come hotter, and smarter, and nicer, and younger.

NY:
Silex: They are fun to watch because they are so odd. I just can’t avert my gaze. I have no other words.
Bethenny: Married? Preggers? Woo hoo! I have always liked her, even though she is a bit Jersey for a NYC girl.
Ramona: Froot Loop. But, we need her to stir it up and she knows it.
Countess: Come on! She has potential to be a “get real” person, but puts on airs…..
Whatshernamewashedupmodel: I don’t have the desire to offer an opinion since she is so not in my world or anyones……
Jill: Love her, but she can be a bit too much with the snobbery to others.

NJ:
Prostitution Whore! I miss this one more than any other.

stole this from CBHM

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Taught 7^th grade
went to an air show
went to Great Falls
went to the Presidential Inauguration
threw clay on a pottery wheel and ended up with something
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don’t think I made any, and I probably won’t make many this time either.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Nope. Thank goodness

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Nope. Thank goodness!

5. What countries did you visit?

None

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

Money to travel, less anxiety.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Inauguration Day – coldest I’ve ever been – 16 hours outside “working” for the Obama people. Saw Obamas, up close! And Bidens, up close!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I don’t feel like I had any achievements this year. Hmmm.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not taking care of my house and yard.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Ear infection, a cold, but luckily not much else!

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Birkenstock clogs.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Maybe Dr. Schelchkov.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

That nurse. Tiger.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Bills, food, gas.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

The inauguration.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

Well, I am not good at this since I don’t listen to popular music, I love Andrew Lloyd Webber and listen to his stuff a lot.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? sadder
b) thinner or fatter? fatter
c) richer or poorer? Poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Walk, exercise, garden.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Eat, drink. Worry.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

Quietly, at home, just the few of us.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?

nope

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Not sure. I watch a lot of “junk” tv – Dr. Phil, food tv,

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Well, I wouldn’t say “hate” but strongly dislike, yes.

24. What was the best book you read?

The Help

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Susan Boyle – but she is not really MY discovery.

26. What did you want and get?

A book from my childhood.

27. What did you want and not get?

More surprises

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

It’s Complicated – just saw it, and I loved it.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

45. FortyFive. Wow. Went to dinner and had a blizzard.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

To have more peace of mind, and less craziness at work.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

slob, and if it sort of fits, wear it.

32. What kept you sane?

Who says I am sane?

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Obama.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

Health Care.

35. Who did you miss?

Eliza.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Dianne – not actually met, but got to know a bit.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009

well, still learning really – relax

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

“I feel good” (James Brown)

I’ve been in a funk lately, and have not read anything in the past few weeks, despite having plenty of reading time. The last think I read was an old David Sedaris, which was very entertaining as usual. I decided to try the British book reading challenge that I saw on a friend’s blog. I love British authors, so this should be fun, and will helpfully make me a bit more focused on my choices and speed of reading.

For Christmas, I got one book. I requested it, and my husband followed through. (A fact that has made him especially pleased with himself). It is a childhood book I once had. I think this may just satiate my need to revisit the idealism of my childhood*. I loved books from as earlly as I can remember, and I remember trying to decipher letters and words very early on. I remembered this particular book a few years ago, but could only recall the pictures and a foggy story line. Through many hours of googling, I finally found it! http://www.darewright.com/ – the author’s website. i put it on my Christmas list (a list is totally opposed to what I want to happen on Christmas, but found it necessary with my forgetful and somewhat OCD husband). And yesterday, the postman delivered a fresh, brand new copy of the book. I think I loved it as a little girl because of the photos, and the story line. The actual book is A Gift from the Lonely Doll and is about Edith and her homemade Christmas gift for her teddy, Mr. Bear. It is kind of a complex story, but the photography is what got me to remember it 40 years (ahhhhhhhh) later. I don’t know what Christmas it was when I got this book, whether I was 3, 4, or older (publishing date was when I was 2, so it could have even been a hand-me-down book) but I remember vividly it being read to me.

My mother – and to some extent my dad – put the love of reading into all of our lives. I don’t remember my dad reading to me much, but my mom read to me at bedtime every night until I could read myself. I devoured my books, over and over again. My parents house was filled with books and an evening would more often find everyone cozied up reading vs. watching TV. I feel very thankful that reading came easy to me, and feel very sad for my students who don’t have such luck.

Of my childhood, I still have a few books, a couple Nancy Drew’s, and Where the Wild Things Are. Now I have a few ** to replace, and then I will have the most precious to me back in my possession. I have a lot of books that I have not read yet, and if I was particularly ambitious and confident I would make those my reading challenge of 2010. However, just like I am a historian who lives in a historic town but has not seen all he historic sights, I like the anticipation and the savouring of the undone, unseen and unread. Is that weird?

In 2010, I am going to read, of course, but this trip down memory lane will even allow me to release my husband’s beloved used paperbacks from the attic. I was a snob, and have my hardbacks organized by color in the living room, and paper backs are relegated to closets, piles, baskets and boxes. After realizing the powerful memories associated with the books of our youth, I think some bookcases with not so attractive books will be allowed.

*As soon as I get another copy of Ukelele and her New Doll.
**And, the Honey Bunch series

Next post: The Civil War books…..