Month One Complete

So, the school year is in full swing as I avoid completing the first interim grades. I am still feeling trepidacious and trying to do my best to not get burned out. My paychecks have actually decreased as health insurance rates went up. I thought with the health care reform that wouldn’t be the way it worked, but if my students can get healthcare, I’ll work for less.

I have some wonderful students. Almost all, and really I can’t think of any that don’t, try their best. Many of them seem to be very distrustful of teachers. So many of the teachers last year were so bad, that I don’t blame them. It goes back to my rant last spring about people in the profession who don’t care. I can’t imagine being a teacher and not caring about students. It’s like a doctor who doesn’t care about patients, a network administrator who hates computers. Incongruous.

Teaching Language Arts is ok, but I am so lacking that I am sure I need to get some major help. I love to read, and I love words and playing with language, but in reality, my background knowledge is weak as the California school system in the 70’s didn’t have a good English curriculum. Mr. Powell (was that his name?) was pretty good, but I hated him. Mrs. DeLong was awful. The majority of what i have learned about reading has come from my mother and father, both voracious readers.

Right now I have a handful of students who I don’t mesh with well. One is in serious need of psychotherapy, one who I fear will end up in prison, and a few who are followers of those two. I have never seen a group of manipulative manipulators before. It is odd. I am at a crossroads with one who feels like I am “picking on” her. If making her restate phrases like “that be whack” is picking, so be it. If she wants out of my class for that, oh well. I will be a soldier for proper English. I love and admire all languages, wish I could speak more, but I think we should be true to each one, even whilst recognizing that they evolve. I’m not a fan of ebonics, at least not in an American English classroom.

Changing topics: I finished my portrait of Katie. It came out wonderful and I am so shocked that I could do it. Bill Harris is a magician when it comes to teaching painting. Today, it was kind of amusing to notice a student of his who didn’t follow any of his direction and had a crappy painting. The man knows what he is doing, and I am so inspired and uplifted by it, that the cost is worth every penny. I know that the painting could use more work, but once it said to me, “I am Katie” I stopped. i think Bill would have had me do more, but sometimes, a painting is just done. I feel free now that I have finished it. I am only painting things I love deeply. If you spend so much time and energy on something, it should be something that one has passion about. The best news I’ve had in months is that Katie saw it and thought it was great. I’m on cloud 9. I hope I don’t fall through.